Amazing story in one of my favorite papers…New York Times –of course! Sunday, April 16th, 2017. Article written by Alex Beam. Posing the question “what kind of pet should President Trump have in the White House?” I guess someone tried to give his youngest son a golden doodle but Mr. Trump begged off – he probably knew flying is hard on pets and sometimes if your not careful in Florida an alligator can eat them…accidentally.
Some people think he’s definitely dog person while others a cat person. I think he should get an elephant! See it has to be a rescued elephant from Thailand. Being the elephant is a symbol for the Republican Party -it might make some people wake up with a smile on their faces. Think of it…I’m surprised President Trump and all his family members didn’t get an elephant before I said it. It could be another BIG MONEY MAKING BUSINESS… and just think of the money they will save on gardeners. This business could pay for lots of other “stuff”. The elephant could roam the White House grounds eating grass, small plants, fruit, twigs, tree bark and roots…and coffee cherries…o.k. a lot of coffee cherries and they have to be 100% Arabica Beans. ( 8,800 beans or so …to create one Kilogram or 2.2 lbs of coffee beans.) Actually, I read Elephants enjoy eating coffee cherries and it isn’t bad for them…and they poop this amazing digested coffee bean that is called Black Ivory Coffee. It’s a very rare coffee and very EXPENSIVE. About $50 dollars a cup. Let’s do the math…supposedly 100 million cups of coffee are drunken daily in the USA. I would think around one percent of our population could afford this coffee so 100,000 Million at 1% is approximately 100,000 thousand x $50 dollars equals around $500,000 dollars -not bad. Ok….ok..so we are all cringing at the idea of poop and coffee in the same sentence. But you guys! it’s supposed to be the smoothest coffee on the earth! (The idea behind it is when it’s getting digested or fermented the proteins breakdown and the bitterness of the coffee bean dissipates.)
Two things worry me. Will our national pet elephant be safe? (Being Donald Trump Junior shot one on his Safari.) I hope so. I figure once the elephant has an official name no one would dare hurt it. The other thing is I can’t name THIS elephant Dumbo…so what would be a really good name for a really BIG elephant that poops out expensive coffee….Ummm …unsure…any ideas?